I used to hate everybody else’s kids until I had a daughter of my own. It changes you, or it might change you, and I’m glad it changed me. Patience is the #1 thing I’ve learned from the experience, and the value I place on family changed exponentially.
So I’ve been patient for 8+ years as my baby girl has evolved into the complex animal that she is now. I put a lot of racing and training goals on hold, without regret, in place of doing what I knew was right – taking care of my family when they needed me.
All of a sudden - and I mean all of a sudden, I have a daughter that digs on staying home alone for 1.5 hours while I ride or run. She enjoys going to races and hanging out with other friends and their kids, giving me an opportunity to ride with the boys – not worrying about her safety one bit. She helps race organizers with food/drinks/timing while I get to compete stress-free. The change in her mental makeup between age 7 and 8 may be subtle on the surface and complex underneath, but the change for me is monumental.
When I was in my mid-30’s, older friends spoke of their kids being grown enough to take care of themselves, and I just looked at them with tired eyes wondering how and when that happens. Sleep deprivation dulled everything for me and I just saw the vision they painted with words as a mirage. So, I rode at midnight after staying awake with a sick girl until she fell asleep. I ran at dawn so I could be back by 7:30am to give my wife a break. I showed up to many races knowing that I was a step slower and knowing I had no chance, but I kept the fire of competing front and center by….showing up.
Now I’ve got several peeps out there that are having kids soon – the 30something crowd. My friends I will pass on what was shared with me. Be patient, don’t worry about missing a training ride/run or two, take your lumps at the races and take your time with your family. Know that you’ll be back when the time is right. Rested, motivated, and with a new understanding of the importance of taking care of your body like we all didn’t when we were young.
You mean it changes to something other than only seeing your kid 1-2 hours a day, your spouse 1-2 hours a day and fighting the net cummulative effect of shorting yourself sleep by 1-2 hours a day all the while working 10-12 hours a day to try to maintain a good quality of life for the family that you only see on occasion?
ReplyDeleteI have 5 bikes, a pair of hiking boots, two pairs of running shoes, a backpack, a child-carrier backpack and numerous other items that are seeing little to no use. I hope they forgive me when I finally go to pick them up and reaquaint myself with them.
Dude - I don't know about the rest of all that, but the kid part...it gets easier.
ReplyDeleteBS- by the time you are riding regularly again your bikes will be outdated relics. Then... you get to build new ones!
ReplyDeleteFlip side... you will be a relic too.
Nahhh, Big Steve will sell 'em to me so he'll have a wad of cash to build a sweet SS.
ReplyDelete